WOW.
I can't believe we have reached the Half-Time already!
It feels like just yesterday we took that test (Ok 3 Tests....) and discovered we had a Peanut on the way!
But, I shouldn't be surprised it went by so fast...
You know when you are dreading something how time starts to speed up "Like.. Whoa"?
Hold On! Wait for it!!!
Let me clarify...
I don't dread my beautiful Peanut arriving, I can't wait to meet my baby!
But...I am dreading the transportation route he is going to take..........ummmm through me.
I mean I've never been seriously ill or had any broken bones or major surgeries so I'm thinking there is some major OUCH-TASTIC time is in my future and I'm not gonna lie.....
I'm Kinda Scared!
It's a small price to pay to welcome a healthy Peanut into the world and is completely worth it!
BUT..... I definitely don't see anything wrong with admitting that me and my undercarriage are a bit nervous!
However to give some perspective and make myself feel better, I made the following list..
Things that scare me more than giving birth to Peanut:
1. Being attacked by a Great White Shark or a Megalodon (that has somehow survived hidden deep below the sea for millions of years).
I feel confident that my preparation studying Shark Week for the past 14 years has taught me some valuable lessons, but still....Momma don't play that!
2. Zombie Apocalypse!
I'm not in the best shape and I'm terrified of knives, blood and guns.
Krista=Screwed.
Steve has promised to protect me in the event that this occurs, but I'm planning on packing him and Peanut up and taking them straight to to my sister's future husband, Uncle Jarrod...The Cop, instead.
3. Psycho Shower Attack!
Sometimes Steve forgets to lock the door in the morning and leaves me unprotected. After I discovered this, I started to formulate plans for escape from Shower Murder. Let's just say my Lavender Bubble Bath isn't in a metal tin just for decoration....
4. Having to Return to High School
This used to be a reoccurring nightmare of mine.
Oh God. SO. TERRIFYING.
5. Hannibal Lecter
This actually made me afraid to hear the words "Fava Beans". I know beans can't hurt me, but I'll never eat them. EVER.
6. The Human Centipede (was too afraid to input a link to Wikipedia)
Thank YOU (NOT!) Amy and Brittney for bringing this movie to my attention. The description alone was enough to give me nightmares forever and I hate you.
7. The Garbage Disposal
I will NEVER put my hand down there. EVER. I don't care if the switch is off. What if someone accidentally bumps it back on? Yick.
EEeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkkk!
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